Webmaster & Michael Jackson Impersonator (no, really…)
So, as is customary, I’m the last one to finish my bio. I decided before going any further, to read what everyone else is saying about themselves. Finding much interest, creativity, and humor in everyone else’s bio, I declared out loud, “OK, I’m starting over, my bio is lame.” To which the representative to my left we call Dan, if that is his real name, replied, “maybe it’s not your bio.” Oh yes, the bar has been raised (Dan likes bars), the gauntlet laid down (Dan likes weapons), and the line drawn in the sand (Dan hates beaches, I’m guessing). I will not rest until my bio is better than Dan’s. Let’s do this…
Ah heck, who am I kidding. Dan’s already beat me. He is good. In fact he’s so good, my bio has already been mostly about him. I was going to start talking about how many comics I collected as a kid, but that’s already starting to sound a lot like Dan. Oh, I know, my love of good beer. Darn. Dan again.
But in all seriousness, other than the collecting paychecks part, that’s where our bio’s diverge. I’m neither mysterious nor enigmatic, whatever that means, I tend to enjoy taking pictures instead of drawing them, and I have never robbed a bank, as far as I know.
One of my favorite movies growing up was Chitty Chitty Bang Bang. I had a hat and cane and used to perform “Me Ole’ Bamboo” for my family. I couldn’t sing, but boy could I dance. I used to perform lip sync contests doing my Michael Jackson impressions. I placed 3rd in a regional contest that would have given me 15 minutes of fame on MTV. I was going to be a star, until karaoke came along and they expected you to actually sing too. My lip sync days sadly ended, much like Brian’s first business venture, a failure.
But like Brian, I believe in continually improving and reinventing myself, or at least trying to figure myself out, which I guess makes me kind of enigmatic, if only to myself. Here is what I do know…
Pets: Nesta (Lynx-point Siamese), Truffles (English Springer Spaniel), Bud (Rock)
Hobbies/Interests: Homebrewing, Online Marketing, Photography, Lumberjack
Favorite Book: Michael Jackson’s Beer Companion: Revised And Updated, The Homebrewer’s Companion, The Book of Beer Pong: The Official Guide to the Sport of Champions
Favorite Music: I Drink Alone (George Thorogood), Beer Drinkers and Hell-Raisers (ZZ Top), Roadhouse Blues (The Doors), 40 Oz. To Freedom (Sublime), The Man Who Loved Beer (David Byrne), Beercan (Beck), Beer Drinkin’ Woman (Memphis Slim), Warm Beer And Cold Women (Tom Waits), Six Pack (Black Flag), Chug-A-Lug (Roger Miller), Take me drunk, I’m Home (Dangerous Toys), You’re Pretty When I’m Drunk (Bloodhound Gang), I Think I’ll Just Stay Here and Drink (Merle Haggard). And just for diversity; Gin & Juice (Snoop Doggy Dog), Tequila (The Champs), Escape – The Pina Colada Song (Rupert Holmes), Red, Red Wine (UB40), Margaritaville (Jimmy Buffet), Have a Drink on Me (AC/DC), and One Burbon, One Scotch, One Beer (George Thorogood)
Favorite Breweries: Stone Brewery, Dog Fish Head, Magic Hat
Favorite Beer Style: India Pale Ale
Favorite TV shows: The Man Show, The Universe, Flight of the Conchords, ESPN Sportcenter, Breaking Bad, The Daily Show, Planet Earth, and Wipeout
Favorite Movies: The Adventures of Bob & Doug McKenzie: Strange Brew, In America, Godfather, Garden State, Talking Heads Stop Making Sense, Good Fellas, Caddyshack, Star Wars, Monty Python and the Holy Grail, In Bruges, Seven Pounds, Monsters Inc., The Big Chill, Analyze This, Do The Right Thing, The Shining, Blazing Saddles, Meet the Parents, O Brother, Where Art Thou?, The Shawshank Redemption, Apollo 13, Blade Runner, The Whole Nine Yards, March of the Penguins, War of the Worlds, Lord of the Rings, Being John Malkovich, Raising Arizona, Saving Private Ryan, Fargo, Animal House, Slingblade, The Sixth Sense, Richard Pryor Live In Concert, not necessarily in that order. I feel like I am forgetting some…
Favorite Food: My own smoked pulled pork, and of course beer marinaded bratwurst on the grill
Favorite Sport: Bowling, Golf, Darts, or any other sport that can be played while drinking beer.
Favorite Sports Team/Athletes: Los Angeles Lakers, Boston Red Sox, New England Patriots, Tiger Woods, Norm Duke
Favorite Quote: Yes, I’ll have another.
Life Ambition: Absolutely